Monday, August 31, 2009, 5:35 AM
i had enough.i'm tired and sick of this rat race. i want to escape to somewhere where no one would be able to hunt for me. Somewhere far from reality, from the earth and the competitive world.
i need a break.
i had enough of the critism, insults and disparagements. Having a desk partner getting 24/30 for math test and saying that her mom would smack her if she had gotten a 23.( obviously, after absorbing the fact that i scored a 23 for my math).
This isnt all.
i even have classmates critisizing and mentioning and comparing my psle score with my partner. Apparently, just by the fact that i scored lower than someone or should i say the lowest in class, she never ever approved on my idea. ( should be thinking that i'm dumb and my ideas are simply not worth considering).
Coming to netball,
its driving me crazy and mad at the same time.
having ***** who would reprimand you in front of your face for not running infront to ask for the ball.
having ------- who doesnt even give a damn about you, thinking how lousy you are and you shouldnt even be selected.
having ****** who dread partnering with you and being in the team as you.
Having ****** begging other teammates to transfer to their school and what about me? ha, just being left aside, never consider asking me to transfer to their school.
I Know i often lose out in my speed,stamina and a great netball mind.
i know i'm vertically challenged.
i know i'm ugly, awful and stupid.
but please i just wish for something, could you respect me? At least respect me as your friend.
Friday, August 28, 2009, 7:37 AM
Its an ordeal that i have to overcome.A tough one.
Thursday, August 13, 2009, 6:10 AM
No matter how much efforts i tried to put in, no one will appreciate it.no one.
i know i'm dumb, i know i;m stupid, i know my ideas are not worth considering, i know i have the lowest psle score in the class but can you at least spare a thought for me?
its really nice, and heartwarming that at least when ------ said that my ideas were feasible unlike you who always seem to side with her and never EVER agrees with my idea.
i deeply regreted promoting to higher mother tongue. Its a mistake.
Sunday, August 9, 2009, 2:17 AM
HAHAHAAHAHAHAHA okay uhm this is for your to start smiling and stop being so pessimistive and emo and negative!!! You're just beside me now muahahhahhaa and i guess you dont even have a single idewa what im doing now right? double muahahahaha. okay whatever. im so happy i studied geog finish already^^ Pleasse cheeeeeeeeeeeeeeeer up, stop saying youre lousy and whatsoever. You're like wayyyyyyy taller than me, no doubt! Hope you'll really2 become more positive and please think that you are better, not lousier ok. Hmmm, i dont know how to use your laptop, as im a noob. Bye2 shaoxuan!! let's go shopping one day if you want huh! ;) Happy National Day and I love you!!!!!
-
alex ;D
Saturday, August 8, 2009, 6:16 AM
'COME ON! WAKE UP ITS NOT THE END OF THE WORLD!'thanks ms rose, for that 3SECS of compliment yersterday.
its the first time the 14s coach every complimented me.
i had never felt the SAME feeling like ytd before. Although its just a mere 3 secs compliment but i really enjoyed it.
Doubt anyone knew the reason why i kept staying at the first third ytd.
it was because i didnt want ms rose to put me in the shooting circle and i am quite sure that i will distract the flow of the game and if i cant put in the shot, everyone has to push up+ star jump. Also, i stayed in the first third all the time as i'm afraid that i will do some unforced mistake and everyone had to be punished again.
Everyone has its own strong ability, but i don't , i realised.
i'm dun have a flair in anything or in anywhere.
shini,she has high elevation.
rochelle, quick feet.
amelia, quick dodges.
monessha, fast sprints.
ainsley, the fear she gave to any of opponent is thoroughly intimidating.
me? what about me?
slowest quick feet. the one who always kick the cones away.
slow sprint. lousy stamina.
often clash into players. inconsistent shooting.
someone people is afraid of passing the ball to, in case they lose ball.
ms rose "your reaction is too slow."
" i need to change some player maybe shaoxuan you would like to join the other team?"
i'm like a ball being pass around, like reserve who is always the bench warmer and no one would like to do passes with me or be in my group.
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Hello! I'm Toh Shao Xuan from CHIJ St Nicholas Girls'. I'm in Netball and I'm born on 4th April! :D
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kailin!
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